Costa Del Sol, Spain
Jul/09
Spain in a Pain!
After arriving in Alicante, we picked up our Smart car and drove south toward Malaga and the Costa Del Sol where we had secured a free timeshare for 5 nights thanks to Bryan’s parents trade. Unfortunately it was pretty much disastrous upon arrival. We had known that the Costa Del Sol was a big resort area, which we generally don’t like, but we imagined it to be a lot like Cabo San Lucas: a nice pretty beach lined with resort hotels and restaurants. Well it was nothing like Cabo, and the only way we can describe it is like a time share hell. There was building after building, crammed together with no open space and there was nothing that looked nice or pretty about it, even the sea which we heard was cold anyway.
Time Share Hell
First of all the beaches and streets were jam packed with some of the ugliest people on the planet. Enormous, sunburnt, tattooed fatties were waddling around half naked everywhere you looked…it was disgusting. Secondly, the streets were horrid for driving, congested with traffic, roundabouts clogged with trolls. Just getting to the “hotel” was a nightmare! When we finally got to our destination: The Royal Oasis Club at Benal Beach, and we attempted to drive up to the entry to check in and drop off our luggage. But there was a gate and a guard blocking the entrance telling us that check-in was not in the building but across the street. We thought that was a little strange, but it wasn’t tell after checking in and parking on the street (yes no parking at the “resort”) that we realised that this was not even a hotel or resort but an apartment building! A very, very ghetto and nasty, gross, disgusting apartment building with graffiti and barbed-wire. So this resort company had bought some of the units inside and renovated them, but the outside and hallways were a total dump! We were livid! We may not have done very much research, but how could we have expected that? The more we walked around the more horrible the place was.
We can’t understand why people come here in droves. It was like all the riff-raff of Europe were holding a convention.We will never ever return even with in hundreds of miles of the place — we hated it that much! We felt trapped and like the second half of our wonderful trip was being ruined. We had planned on this hotel being a base to explore Andalusia by car, but had no idea the street congestion would have made it so difficult to get away from the coast. So we decided to go and stay in Seville for a few days.
Ulm, Germany
Jul/09
We drove to Germany because we were dropping off Megan’s parents rental car for them at Memmingen Airport before flying to Spain. Probably not the best idea, but we were able to meet Megan’s online friend Martina and her fiancée Wolfi where they live in Ulm. Megan met Martina a few years ago on a website that helps people practice languages called My Happy Planet. Martina was looking to practice English and Megan wanted help with German. Unfortunately or fortunately Martina’s English was leaps and bounds beyond Megan’s German so they wound up mostly chatting in English in Skype’s video chat.
We stayed with them in their apartment in Neur-Ulm and they generously treated us to a dinner of enormous pancakes. Martina also took us on a little tour of the city and we climbed the worlds tallest church tower Ulm, Germany. During our city tour we found people on the river practicing for the upcoming water jousting tournament Fischerstechen which made us laugh quite a bit (video below). The two boats pass each other with a man standing on the back of each with the objective to knock the other into the water with a long wooden pole. It looked like a lot of fun and wished we could have experienced the actual tournament. A few weeks later Ulm also has what looks like a fun summer event called Schwörmontag, which is like a parade festival on the river. Too bad we missed both!
Trieste, Italy
Jun/09
Driving from Lake Bled to Zadar wasn’t exactally a straight shot due to our obligation to drop off our rental car in Italy to avoid a hefty fee. So before crossing the border into Croatia we swung into Italy to drop off the car in Trieste. According to a book we have called 101 Beautiful Small Towns of Italy Trieste was looking like a lovely place to stop for lunch. Unfortunately we did not do any research about where to go in Trieste, thinking that in these small towns it must be obvious, however, when we arrived we discovered that Trieste is in fact not a small town but a gritty large port city! We never found the “beautiful small town” part, but we did find some pizzas. There wasn’t much to see there and our family of five seemed to get a few stares as we felt out of place as tourists here. It looks like a nice place to see in the book, but we are still not sure where the place we were supposed to go is.
Bergamo, Italy
Jun/09
Luca was right, Bergamo was “molto bello.” We had heard it called the “wealthiest city in Italy”, and our expectations didn’t let down. The entire old town is built atop a steep cliff. Cars are not allowed in the old city on the weekends so we had to take the stuffy, hot and unventilated Funicular to the top, where upon exiting we were drenched in our own sweat and the smell of deodorentless Europeans. The old town, or “Bergamo Alta” was very well maintained, very walkable and shoppable. It seems like an important city historically as well as architecturally, as there are many gems to be found here. It was the first city invaded by the Nazis in Italy and there was a park with lots of WWII memorabilia and statues. Luca and Massimo explained that when the Nazis came to Ghisalba they knocked down doors and stole all the children away and killed them.
We were surprised to see tourists in the city as it barely appears in any guidebooks. Other than us the tourist population seemed to be mostly from other parts of Europe, like somehow that the city just never made it into the English guidebooks. But it was very interesting, with its obvious Venetian influence and interesting architecture. It seemed very rich. We loved being in a beautiful city that didn’t feel overly crowded or over touristy in the high season. It felt like we had a secret. Luca and Massimo insisted on paying for the entire excursion and we returned back to Ghisalba to pack up our things before saying our goodbyes and heading on our way to Slovenia.
Ghisalba, Italy
Jun/09
En Route
After barely conquering the road from Bellagio back to a highway, (which never seemed to be the highway because it took us so long to get anywhere near Ghisalba) we made a stop to quickly call (using our iphone) and inform the relatives that we were running late. Unfortunately the Italian word for “late” had slipped Bryan’s mind and after twenty minutes of getting nowhere in Italian the conversation ended with “Sono Retardo!” Yes, finally something they understood: ‘I am retardo’. It took twenty minutes and about thirty dollars in roaming charges to get them to understand we were running late.
But getting there could not be that easy! On the road we realized that the directions we had hastily printed in the wee hours before our trip were to the street Ghisalba in a neighboring town, and not the actual Ghisalba! So after getting lost again, we decided to pop into a pharmacy so someone could confirm we were at least in the vicinity of Ghisalba and point up in the right direction. This also turned into another big twenty minute ordeal with the pharmacist quasi-comprehending what Bryan was asking. Bryan then asked the pharmacist to call the family telling them we would be even more late, but would arrive shortly. Instead the family decided it would be better if they came to meet us and direct us back.
So there we stood and waited by a bridge, watching every car pass by wondering if they could be the family. Each person driving past in cars appeared to stare at us, making us all the more confused as to who it could be. One car honked and a man got out and walked toward us speaking to us in Italian. He didn’t look excited to see us at all, but then it became clear that he merely wanted help moving the “bridge closed” sign which we were standing next to, so he and his friend could drive over the bridge. It then dawned on us that we were not imagining that people were starring at us, because they were all trying to read the sign and wondering “why is that bridge closed?”
Eventually a packed car of ecstatically smiling Iotti’s arrived to meet us. We exchanged greetings and Luca (Bryan’s 5th or 6th cousin) came to ride with us back to Ghisalba. Luca spoke about as much English as we did Italian, and he managed to talk non-stop the whole way to Ghisalba explaining to us that Ghisalba is not “bello” but Bergamo was “molto bello” and he would take us there tomorrow. We arrived at the home of Franco and Mariella, who would generously host us for our stay. They showed us around their apartment and our room for the night (which was their room), we showered and then sat with them in their living room trying to hold a conversation with them in Italian, as they spoke no English. At worst it was only mildly awkward.
Iotti’s — Ghisalba Style
Once the rest of the family arrived for dinner, they took us to a pizza restaurant nearby. Luca drove us in his mini cooper with his mother Marisa. We talked about politics — how they hate (Italian PM Silvio) Bunolesconi, repeatedly calling him a “pedophilia” because of all his escapades widely reported in recent times. They also spoke of their dislike for him because he lets all the Africans in and does nothing about it (which was very evident, because we did not expect to see so many non-Europeans in the countryside). We soon noticed that Luca’s knowledge of English must be straight from hollywood movies due to the awkward use of curse words such as “Brunelesconi fuck you!” or “Brunesconi fuck off!” He also refused to stop talking about how Jim Morisson was the greatest. Luca and Marisa were very chatty and very funny and we laughed the whole way to the restaurant. Plus Megan really liked that Marisa kept saying that she had a “figura” like a “top model.”
The pizza at the restaurant was just ok, nowhere near as good as the amazing pizza we lived off of in Rome. But they do things differently in the north and pizza is more of a southern dish. During dinner the family ridiculed Megan for having wine with her pizza, as it was customary to drink beer only with pizza. Misunderstanding where we had come from earlier in the day, they kept asking when we are going to Lake Como, we had so much trouble trying to say “already” in Italian the waiter was called over and explained to them what we were trying to say. His explanation was followed by a big gasp of understanding by the group.
The Never-Ending Castle Tour and the “Crazy Aunt”
The next morning Massimo, who looks like the stereotypical “Italian Stallion” with his deep tan and long dark hair which he tosses about, took us with his daughter, Aurora and her cousin (or friend) Julia (or Guilia) on a tour of Ghisalba and the neighboring towns and castles. Luca was right, Ghisalba was not beautiful. It has a few old churches and buildings, but unlike the country village we had imagined it to be, in reality it is a conglomeration of ugly modern apartment buildings surrounded by corn fields (grown for polenta). The first stop we made was at the big church in the center of town, which looked like a younger Roman pantheon painted yellow. After that we went to visit an old woman who they called “the crazy aunt.” When we asked why she is crazy they informed us she kisses too much. They were right. We were not really sure who she was or how she was related but she offered us coca-cola (everyone assumes we must love coca-cola here, which we don’t) and biscuits. We politely declined and let her kiss all over us and tell us how “bello” we are.
We proceeded on the the town’s graveyard where we basically just took pictures of all the Iotti graves. Then we went from one castle to another in neighboring towns until we realized that every town in Italy has its own castle and we didn’t need to see anymore. Later we visited another assumed relative and her assumed retarded son. For all we knew it could have been her father. We had not a clue who they were, but they were happy to meet us, even if we were interrupting the Pope’s Sunday message that they were watching on TV in the kitchen.
Across the street Massimo showed us the church he was married in and we briefly met some mysterious people who may or may not have been related before meeting up with everyone for lunch. Lunch consisted of a strange meal in the yard of various types of meat, the main meat being the one that Franco barbecued. It was edible, but not the amazing old world family meal that we had imagined. After lunch, Luca and Massimo took us to Bergamo before we returned to say our goodbyes. Upon departure we were given gifts of local wine, a book on Ghisalba history, a snack pack for the road and Luca and Aurora both gave us CD’s of their favorite music which we listened to in the car on the way to Slovenia.
a dying breed
Lake Como, Italy
Jun/09
Transport Tension
After two nights without sleep (+/- time changes) and 18 hours jetting eastward we landed in Milan, Italy. This was our first time on Italian soil since the study abroad tip of 2005 we so fondly remember. We got off to a late start due to two airport delays. The first at our connection in Philadelphia and the second upon landing in Milan, where despite the captain’s self proclaimed “textbook landing” we blew a tire and had to be taxied to the gate. By the time we got to the car rental counter we were already two hours late, slicing off two hours of our already limited Lake Como time. We set off in our Lancia rental car with only hours to go before we were scheduled to meet Bryan’s distant family at 3pm in a village about an hour away.
At 9AM we headed from Milan’s airport toward Lake Como. Megan was behind the wheel with her trusty navigator Bryan at her side. The reason for this arrangement is that the Lancia is a manual and Bryan has yet to hone his cultch skills. In addition, our last European driving adventure where Bryan was driving and Megan was navigating resulted in some rather heated exchanges, so we decided to take our chances with this arrangement.
The drive started off good and it felt great to be back. As we passed our first tollbooth only paying a modest toll (for European roads) of €2 we appeared to be making good time. Just after the toll booth, our directions instructed us to take the first exit which lead to a roundabout. Confusion about which way to exit led us out the roundabout the same way we had come in. Normally, this could have been corrected by a harmless U-turn, but here we had to pay 2 extra tolls before we were on the right road to Mennagio. We quickly rebounded from the ding of the unnecessary extra tolls once we saw our first view of the beautiful Lake Como from the road.
Como: A love story
The road meandered along the lake, peached high on the hills as we passed through tiny towns on the way to our destination. Taking in the “bellisimo” view, we couldn’t help but think that George Clooney must be a genius. In Como we visited two towns: Mennagio and Bellagio, running out of time for Vernazza, where we had heard was considered the 3rd jewel on the lake. After some gelato and a lakeside stroll we drove onto the ferry headed for Bellagio, the tiny town that the sadly more famous mega-Vegas hotel is named after (we can’t tell why). The waterfront town was tiny, but still challenging to explore due to the tiny hilly streets.
We spent as much time as possible in Lake Como before it was high time to head over to Ghisalba, but Lake Como wouldn’t let us go so easy. The way back was a treacherous one, only magnified by a exhausted driver and a stick shift. You see, the road we took from Bellagio to the highway was as windy as they come, as high up on cliffs as they come, as one lane with two way traffic as they come and seemed like as long as they come. Adding to that was the lack of railings that added to the danger of it all. Megan handled them like a champ. Miles and miles of very narrow and very windy roads on the edge of very steep cliffs on very little sleep in the past 72 hours is a terrible combination.
The motherland is calling
Jun/09
Megan is sleeping while she packs
It is 2:32 AM and we are almost ready to embark on our second trip to the European motherland this year. Our flight leaves in less than 4 hours, and we are doing another all-nighter. We have developed a special technique the night before big trips that involves staying up all night with the intention to sleep on the plane (which never happens). Somehow the lack of sleep seems to counteract the jet-lag in the same vein as multiplying two negative numbers makes a positive, whatever the case we hope it works this time.
Europe On A Shoestring: Go Further, Stay Longer, Pay Less
Feb/09
This book has been with us on multiple budget trips to Europe. It is huge and heavy if you are truly focused on packing light you may just want to rip out sections. But because our Europe plans have always been somewhat up in the air we have always taken the whole thing, and it has really helped out! Just this month when we went to Europe, we hopped off the plane and drove about 30 minuets out of the Frankfurt airport before we realized we forgot to get a map at the rental car counter. Not to worry, we had our mega-Europe book with us and managed to get all the way to Brussels just off the maps in this book. The book covers all of Europe, so does not go into too much detail on each place and many small towns are left out. But that is sort of a necessary evil for this type of book. Plus when you travel on a whim like we do, its better to keep it short and sweet. We are never that prepared when we arrive somewhere and I think the book knows we don’t have the patience to really research and buy a separate guidebook for each place. For students who are studying abroad and plan on traveling all around Europe after the semester but haven’t decided where to go, this is the kind of book they need. This was the book we needed.
Strasbourg, France
Feb/09
We drove down to Strasbourg, France from Utrecht, Netherlands with Bryan’s sister Jimi for two nights before we flew home from Frankfurt, Germany. The city is known for its historic location in the Alsace region, which has been fought over for centuries between France and Germany and retains influence from each. Now officially part of France, the architecture, food and names of city’s streets and residents are a mix of German and French.
When we arrived at our hotel, Bryan went to make what should have been an short trip around the block to the parking spot in the front of our hotel. Instead the one way streets had got him very lost and led him on a tour all around the city. Megan became really worried, thinking he got arrested or maybe even kidnapped. Our first night we dined at the winstub that Jaques Chiraq eats when he is in town, famous for its traditional Alsacian food and atmosphere: Chez Yvonne. It was a delightful meal, complete with complementary headcheese which Bryan dove right into while the girls wearily watched.
The next day we woke up to a frosty Valentine’s day and set out to see the sights. We saw the large cathedral (see street performer video above) and the old quarter of half timbered buildings (above) with sagging roofs that looked like they could cave any minute. We had a run-in with a cranky crepe maker, who thought we wanted 3 crepes, when we only wanted to split one between 3 people. She kept asking us in French, saying louder each time “with what?” and we were trying to tell her “fin!” After much grunting and irritation on her part she let us pay and leave probably thinking we are just some more stupid Americans whose French is inadequate. After a bit of shopping and some delicious bakery bread we returned early to our hotel, unable to get a seat at any restaurant on Valentines Day and watched a movie. We liked Strasbourg, but felt was more like Germany with a French twist!
Feb/09
Amsterdam, shamsterdam…
To put it simply: we didn’t like Amsterdam. Megan had this grand idea in her mind that she was going to love Amsterdam. We both wanted to believe that the city was more than just drugs and hookers; a city rich with history and interesting architecture. Wishfully thinking that we could easily bypass the tourist areas and discover the real Amsterdam, we wandered for hours unsuccessfully. Because the city itself is relatively small, it was nearly impossible to escape the lewd behavior of tourists and the overall tackiness that Amsterdam’s reputation had attracted. It seems the Dutch are too proud to admit that their “tolerance” for filth has caused what once was their greatest city to turn into the worst. It is the definition of tourist trap, a cesspool of undesirable behavior, crawling with shady people and an unruly immigrant population that has caused as surge in violent crimes in recent years.
We know it sounds harsh, but that was our honest impression. Granted we may have missed out on the true highlights of the city and only saw the areas where people go to “get away with things,” but we really did want to like it. We walked around waiting for something to impress us, but with each corner we turned, we just felt uninspired by it all. It was like the city had no soul. We think we would have enjoyed it much more a few hundred years ago or even 50 years ago before the charm had been completely overrun by low life tourists. As much as we thought it was a total shithole, we are still open to returning one day when the famous flowers and in bloom and if someone promises to show us some unadulterated charm, if any that the city still possesses.
The Dutch seem to be so blinded with pride in their “open-mindedness,” that they don’t see the cancer that has moved into their city and is inhabiting any remaining skeleton of what once was. But, we know that there are many places much more culturally intact in Holland (like Delft) and we are sure could return to the city with a guide or someone to show us why sober people have fallen in love with it. But on this drab February day, the city was just not speaking to us.
Hot Mess
It got off to a bad start, first dealing with morning business traffic (video above) into the city and then the steep parking fee (€40 for 8 hours) it because clear that we were totally retarded for driving in Amsterdam. We walked around for hours hoping to stumble upon something wonderful like the skinniest house in Amsterdam. We did the obligatory stroll down the red light district in broad daylight, surprised to find more obese African women than crack skinny eastern European imports. Sure it was depressing, but this is one of the main things people come here to see! Fortunately, because we are a couple we were not approached by men selling cheaper drugs (both legal and illegal) and cheaper sex (via the horrific illegal sex trade) that has become prominent in the city.
In many ways the legalization of these things has backfired and the city is now trying to cut back on number of brothels and coffee shops in the city center. We say GOOD! Why does that crap need to be in the city center anyway? Online forums reveal that many Dutch people take great offense to their county being seen this way. They feel insulted that people flock to Amsterdam for the famous filth and don’t spend any time getting to know the Dutch. It seems tourists presume that sex and drugs have more to do with what it means to be dutch than clogs and windmills these days.
The fact that thousands of men come here each year to partake in the act of purchasing a woman for a few minutes is not only depressing but also very sad. Once you realize that many of these women did not chose this life and are being held illegally, it is heartbreaking. The other thing Amsterdam is known for is their “coffee shops” that do not sell coffee but various soft drugs, such as marijuana, hashish and magic mushrooms. There is an abundance of these coffee shops which fill the streets with their unmistakable sour smell. The interesting thing about the coffee shops is that they are not actually legally selling the drugs, but that the government is just “tolerating” it.
This counter culture totally dominates the real underlying culture. The city has become known more for sex and drugs than its history and that is what gets us the most about it, the city is not Dutch! The epitome of what the city now represents is the is something we saw in the window of a souvenir shop: a weed patterned dildo. Now we can only that in the true spirt of Amsterdam this dildo is versatile and doubles for a bong or some vessel for smoking marijuana.
Out of Luck
Desperate to escape from the madness we tried to inconspicuously follow an English guided tour, just to hear a bit more about the city’s history and to escape it in 2009. That didn’t last long and we were left wandering a city alone again. Our biggest regret of the day was not forking over the dough to go into the Anne Frank house. Walking up we were disappointed to see a modern building, looking nothing like what it would have in the 1940′s. Amsterdam had already been expensive and an overall downer for us so with this unfortunate façade and steep €16 entry fee posted on the door we decided to keep walking. We figured it would have been another let down in the city that had tremendously let us down. Later we had heard from other people that the museum was actually well worth the fee and we felt as if we had missed out on one of the best experiences in the city. We were also to cheap to pay for the church in the Attic, but hey this city was not cheap!
We stopped for some blah giant pancakes and pea soup, but were never able to find what we were really excited about: stroopwafels made fresh on the street. We searched high and low and simply could not find any being made. This was perhaps the most disappointing of all. If you have never had a stroopwafel and would like to experience one, try Shady Maple Farms they are made in Holland, organic and vegan! What more could you ask for?



